I just want to write about my Valentine's Day evening. It was the best Valentine's date ever, and with my daughter! We went to a nice Italian restaurant to see her orchestra director play. We were probably a little under dressed, but since we didn't have a reservation we just sat in the bar area and ordered food anyway and listened to the wonderful music. It was a piano player with a string bass and a viola playing melody. At least that's what she said. I thought it was a violin, but maybe not. People there were dressed super nice - maybe more so since it was Valentine's day and something special for them. I was amazed at how glamorous some of the women looked and wondered if I could ever live in that world and dress like that and look that nice. But it didn't get me down, just gave me something to look forward to :). We met the manager who talked to A and said that she should come play sometime with the piano player. So maybe she could get some extra weekend jobs. And then the best of all was that he ended up telling us that our dinner and desserts were on him. Amazing! I almost cried just because I thought that was so nice. Especially after she had been crying earlier because she had to talk to her drunk dad before I got home to pick her up. And then we kind of had to "sneak" out of the house and grab our skirts to change into. I do have the most beautiful angel of a daughter if you ask me. She lights up any room with her smile and her presence. So, she definitely helped make that the best Valentine's Day ever!
Other good news is that I am moving forward on at least two of my issues in life right now, and actually working on the other two at the same time. Life and my attitude about it have definitely changed! I feel so much more alive right now, and I don't know how else to describe it at the moment..more details later...gotta get to work!
I'm missing you terribly and of course think about you all day long...it's weird how I relate everything and every situation to you...but it is not in a disturbing way, just in a kind of philosophical, trying to learn and understand life kind of way. Thanks for everything you have given me and shown me and taught me, and for the feelings and for awakening in me a re-newed desire and longing for the best in life - to be the best I can be. It is a great feeling of joyous feeling of vitality, if that is the right word.
OK. Gotta go since I left this sitting here for hours already...forgot to finish and save.
Love you forever!
Me
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