Hey I feel like it has been forever! I have been swamped and super busy. But, don't think for a minute that I have forgotten you. I think you know (and hope you know) that I will probably never, ever forget you. At this point it feels as if I will never even go one day without thinking of you. And sooooo many things remind me of you anyway. You are absolutely amazing and I hope you are living with the confidence and assurance of who you are and how valuable you are to God and to others. Somehow I think you are, but I will pray for you just in case you need to know how loved you are. I wish I could give you a hug and I so often remember sitting across that table from you two times now long ago and wish I would have known then what I know now, but what could have changed? I don't know and can only hope that one day our paths will cross again for good.
Anyway, I am hopefully slowly but surely knocking down all of my barriers to freedom. It's a little scary, but also a little exhilarating. I miss you so so much! I wonder how you are doing and I also wonder how you are doing in church and if you are progressing in the gospel like you want to. I wish I could talk about it with you. I hope so, and I hope you are really enjoying your children and I am sure they are enjoying you. I am so sorry that you even had to be in the position you were in where you even had to face the thought of losing them. Oh what a tangled web we weave!
I am into the Tribulation Force now. I love reading the books even though I hardly ever get time to. I had lunch with my sister-in-law today. It was nice and good and we ate outside. The weather was nice even though a little overcast. I need to be getting out more to get my vitamin D so I have been outside a little at lunchtime everyday this week. My favorite thing to do lately is go to my favorite grocery store and shop a little and then sit outside and read my book. It's weird because I sit there and relate myself and my friend to different characters at different times. And I'm still so curious to see what ends up happening to Hattie.
Well, I wish I could write more detail, but just in case anyone ever reads this, I don't want to give too much away. I've probably already done too much damage for myself, but I still can't bring myself to write some of my most personal thoughts and problems and feelings - at least lately...I know I probably blabbed and spilled them out when I first started writing. I hope if you ever read this you don't think I'm a fool.
Well, gotta go to bed now...I wish I could turn back time...good night my love!
Me
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